My Secret Mission

This last WE was one of those experiences that was in some ways very predictable and yet in others completely off the wall. A month ago a friend rang up to say (and I’ve heard this before) “ I have some friends that are staying in the 34 th floor of this perfect building………” Being a reliable source a couple of us booked our flights and travelled last WE to rip a few off this puppy! I had to make it a secret mission as only a few of us were invited.

After KL where building access was easy, sneeking around the home sites was a little tedious. However, one building was jumped several times without incident, it was the prelude the one we had come for .

The next day was to prove different though. The call was made to “the friend” who was now going to a party in the evening and wasn’t so sure about the whole thing. I think “Cold feet” best describes it. The other friend was not contactable and the whole plan started to slip away. Emotions became tense as we discussed the number of times BASE jumps failed because of the need to rely on others. But through some masterful manipulation our host coerced “the friend” into leaving the party and fronting up. I do luv the ozzie culture sometimes as it is very bad culturally to flake on your mates if you have really talked yourself up. You will never live it down and our host leveraged this cultural indiosm beautifully. So our friend turned up and we did a rather blatent early evening jump into a fairly busy street to the cheers of many revellers making their way to an evening out. What was fun was waving to the open mouthed and rather flustered securty guard who stood out the front of another building which we landed in front of. He seemed very upset we were having a good time as was every one else watching. Beautifully executed - not much chance of being caught.

However, it was later that night that unfolded a course of events which still perplexes me. We went dancing for a while and I had the opportunity to terrify a few ladies I had never met before which is nothing unusual if you know my dance style. But due to the great mood of the evening we decided to jump the buidling that had been easy access the evening before.

We grabbed our gear and headed to the site. As I jumped the fence with one colleage in tow a loud voice pierced the air “F$#CK Off! You thieving mongrel B@st@rds!” echoed across the construction yard. THe verbal shockwave sent us diving striaght back over the fence returning to the car and leaving. Sitting in the passengers side I felt deflated. I said to my colleage “We aren’t thieves this is bullsh*t” I felt a serious injustice. Working on a twisted notion that the Ozzie culture appreciates rogues with a noble cause and the idea that it were possible to clearly explain our true intentions we decided “ What the hell – lets just go back and explain to the security guard what we were really doing” What is the worst thing he’ll do say “NO!”.

This was the critical mistake. We overestimated the mentality of the security guard based on previous experiences. So we drove right to the front of the construction site, parked and walked calmly towards the security hut. The scurity guard had obviously seen us driving up. With some urgency he gathered a few things and fumbled trying to get out the door from the inside. We walked closer. The door flew open and so did the abuse “You f#cking Pr%cks!!” He immediately rang at my colleage. He was slowly backing away saying sorry with open palms and we both announced we were leaving.

It was too late, the baton the guard had was rapidly presented to the side of my colleages head. My colleage protected himself with his hands and went down. We were totally stunned and could not get away from this 6 and a half foot angry islander quick enough. We moved to the car. The abuse continued and as I was walking back to the car (quite rapidly with my colleage in front) I was also clobbered quite solidly on the back of the head. Never saw it coming and went down like a pilot chute in tow. I managed a rather pathetic “We are not thieves!! We came to jump the building” as I climbed the side of the car and slumped into the passenger side. There was so much rage the words never penetrated the dense angry exterior of the guard and we drove off in complete shock. In the moment I stole a look in his eyes there was so much hatred. I am glad for gun laws in Oz. This was an encouter I had never expected. The power of words were pretty feeble when you have a armed gorrilla behind you.

The bumps on the head set the team moral back a bit. The next day a gridlocked traffic jam prevented us from getting to another jump but one last really hot object in the middle of the city was done to restore our dignity. I nearly hung myself rather nicely from some of the structure with on off heading but was fortunate to be just quick enough to avoid a substantial media event for the WE.

Thanks to those that hosted us and jumped with us.

Luv SLIM