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Thread: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

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  1. #1

    BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Every time I approach an object, I have the urge to poo!! Does anyone share the same problem?x:*

  2. #2

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE


    There is this guy that lives near me that can't make it even close to an object without about 3 stops. Makes for a slow climb. }>

  3. #3
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Every time.

    Adrenaline is brown.

    Did anyone remember toilet paper?

  4. #4
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    I don't want to poo. However, I do sometimes have to stifle an urge to put cigarettes out on my weenie. Anyone else have that problem?

    Todd, shoot me an email re that E and whatever the hell else you've been doing....

  5. #5
    Huckin Idiot
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Wow! That's freakin brilliant! That happens to me every goddam time! And I absolutely never remember the toilet paper either. There's all kinds of crap holding techniques for example.....uh, forget it someone might get offended. One time a couple years ago at a very popular s in N. CA someone laid a large dooker right on the dam steel where we climb up. I'm sure tons of people put their hands on it. What an ass hole!
    Has anyone ever pooed off of an exit point?

  6. #6
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Damn Mike I thoght I'd see you in here since we had that conversation on the climb up last night!!!!!:o
    Remember, even a protec has holes in the top:*

  7. #7
    imported_Tom Aiello
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    I recommend keeping some TP in your helmet. It works as a WDI, too.

    And didn't I here about someone becoming BASE dump 1 a few years ago off a tower in the Pacific Northwest?

  8. #8
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    I think base 515 was working on his CRAP BASE#. Not sure if he got it yet or not. The CRAP "B" in a 5 gallon bucket would have been a funny picture! Too bad the "man" confiscated the camera. I wonder if they developed those pics??

  9. #9
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    When you're seriously injured, you lose control of your bowels. This crapping urge is your subconscious acknowledging that your about to do something really dangerous. You get it all out of the way and aren't as embarassed shoud you be carted off to the ER.
    Like I always say at the last port-o-san or rest stop: Base jumping scares the ##### out of me!
    -Josh

  10. #10
    BLiNC Magazine Supporter (Silver)
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    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    It's known as BASE ass. I get it as bad as anyone. Once, on a failed attempt at a very high altitude "E" outside of Denver, I used all of Hoover's TP wind drift and both of my socks, before I made it back to the parking lot. :-(

    BASE359


  11. #11

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Ouch.:+

  12. #12
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    I have the same problem. Once, the urge to purge my colon stopped me just outside of the fence surrounding a local antenna.

    As I hunkered to address the problem, the headlights of a county sherriff washed over me. Luckily, he didn't see me, but I spent a period of time(hours, it seemed) lying face down in the tall grass with my pants around my ankles. As I waited for him to leave, I fought the urge to finish what I had started, and NOT to smack the countless mosquitos feasting on my ass.

    The cop was soon joined by another. They didn't appear to be aware of my presence, and I was able to hobble away while they were distracted. I stopped to clean up as I reached the treeline, only to find I had left my TP at the scene in my haste to get away. After deciding my comfort was worth the price, I used one of my climbing gloves.

    Anyone need a medium right handed Neumann?



  13. #13
    base615
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Several of my jumping buddies were less than enthusiastic when they once had to witness a baring of my arse followed by a bad case of bum gravy as I tactically discharged in the landing area of a nice little cliff.

    In my defence my guts gave me very little warning just like the rest of them! Most unpleasant especially when I had to trash my socks and grollies due to a lack of toilet paper.

    Enjoy your meal :-)

    Craig

  14. #14
    Micke N
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    Many years ago I was going to jump a tower in FL together with a well known BASE-gear manufacturer and his student. They where climbing little ahead of me and was about 100ft from the top when I saw something falling towards me. Instinctively I hugged the ladder to avoid it and... Splash! Right in level with my feet, on a beam only 5 feet away, the splat of that.... brown thing. x(

    Well, I have NEVER climb 100 ft that fast. I was gonna THROW that student off! But as it turned out it wasn't the student who got a nervous stomach, it was his instructor the experienced BASE jumper! He should have known better than to put his ass over the railing and take a s-hit into the headwind. Right Adam? }>

    Maybe too much chili...

  15. #15
    guest
    Guest

    RE: BASE IS A LAXATIVE

    I will never forget the B of headquarter police in Antwerp, we did like 3 big pizza's upthere as gift for the cops...bon appetito!

    steve
    #684:*

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