to all my dear friends out there....i just want to tell you that i love each and every one of you!!! and those i haven't seen recently, i miss you!! (and yes, those i've recently seen...i miss you too!!)

the epidemic of losses this year is tearing me apart and i'm beginning to almost dread logging on here, for fear of who i'm going to read about next........som please be careful out there my friends!!!! you can use caution/common sense AND push the limits, searching for that elusive edge at the same time! yes, death is an inherent aspect of this awesome sport we live for....and mistakes are harshly judged.....but we CAN also use common sense and weigh the factors involved, hopefully tipping the odds for us, rather than against us!!

i haven't personally known everyone of the deaths we've recently experienced ....but too many hit waaay too close to home! i mourn each and everyone of the losses tho, known or not, and i grieve for their friends, families and loved ones.......

lee left a huge, gaping hole in my heart.....nikolas left me stunned, numb and speechless.....everytime i attempted to say goodbye to dear nik, i just couldn't..... i simply sat here in front of my computer and let the tears slip silently down my cheeks.....but i hadn't really been able to give him up, completely accept his loss so soon after lee....it felt surreal....like some sick joke.....i couldn't truly begin to grieve him, because i couldn't accept it........ then lukas left us....dear lukas......i hadn't seen you since the early ninties, but dennis and i had a joyfully anticipated reunion with you coming soon. not soon enough tho it turns out.........it seems the floodgates won't close now......

i celebrate your lives and the magic you brought to the world, i celebrate the joy and magic you brought to my life and so many others, my dear, dear, departed friends; but i despair in the loss of you....that i will never again experience the pleasure of seeing you and sharing those magic moments we had together......whether jumping, swapping "no #####" stories or gossiping about the most recent hot news in town....

fly on my brothers (and sisters!) fly free, in peace and joy where ever you are!

i certainly hope that this is the last posting of this nature i have to make for awhile.....i'm going to the psycho ward soon if this epidemic doesn't slow down....or better yet.....STOP!!

so please think about this my friends.....if there is a loved one out there that you haven't spoken to in awhile.....don't wait to tell them that you love them!! CALL THEM RIGHT NOW....and let them know....because tomorrow they might be taken away from you.....

peace, love and blue, blue skies......

.............brenda